Freedom from my wanderlust
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| Victoria Nevland-wanderlust |
I spent some time with this song playing in my ear and as I rested in the words I was flooded with a sense of God telling me who he is and how my wondering heart always tries to get in the way of his gift to me. His gift of who he is.
This song really pulls at my heart because its a prayer to take my heart seal it, tune it, and to fix it on God. This prayer of a stillness and a sense of being held and locked to something. A sense that fights the nature of who I've always been.
But as I try to run, like I tend to do, I sit and think about what my heart is aching to be locked onto. What is this song calling my heart to fix itself to exactly?
"Your steadfast love, O Lord extends to the heavens, your faithfulness to the clouds. Your righteousness is like the mountains of God; your judgments are like the great deep; man and beast you save O Lord. How precious is your steadfast love, O God! The children of mankind take refuge in the shadow of your wings. They feast on the abundance of your house, and you give them drink from the river of your delights. For with you is the fountain of life; in your light do we see light."
Psalm 36:6-9
My God, this God we seem so afraid to cling to and follow, is this God. A God of amazing gentleness, who gives rest and brings calm, and who is patiently waiting for us with steadfast love. This God chose me, in all my mess, all my shame, all my brokenness. This God of steadfast love who is faithful beyond reach, who is unchanging and righteous, who protects and who gives us refuge in his mighty wings, who provides for us with abundance and allows us to drink of his delights! He is the fountain of life and he's opened himself up for us. He is now reachable. He is not a distant angry God but is a close and loving God.
"Therefore the Lord longs to be gracious to you and therefore he waits on high to have compassion on you for the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all those who long for him. Oh people of Zion, inhabitant in Jerusalem, you will weep no longer. He will surely be gracious to you at the sound of your cry; when He hears it He will answer you."
Isaiah 30:18-19
"He will tend his flock like a shepherd; he will gather the lambs in his arms; he will carry them in his bosom, and gently lead those that are with young"
Isaiah 40:11
As I get to know this God I follow I am choosing to no longer give in to my wondering heart. This is an amazing God and I will never be this loved and cherished by anyone else. To think this amazing, gentle, kind, and loving God is for all of us and there is no price to following him. There is no quiz to take, no course to follow, and no deeds to do. He died so all we have to do is lay our lives at his feet, stand up, take his hand, and follow. What a precious gift that has been so misunderstood and so distorted.
This is a gift I choose to take.
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