I was thinking about what I would say to them as I stand at that podium or in front of the mirror as they tremble with anticipation and I share what could be some of the most influential words they hear as they embark on this new and mysterious journey of marriage.
I thank my kids for cleaning up their own toys.
I thank my husband for picking up his socks.
I thank my husband for holding the baby while I do the dishes.
As I scan through social media there seems to be a trend of hostility toward thanking our spouses for doing "their job". This saddens me actually.
I say thank you for the bare minimum because when I say "thank you", they hear "I love you." I don't say thank you because I feel like they are doing something extraordinary or because I feel I have to be the 1950's wife and wait at the door in an apron with a plate of cookies. I say thank you because they matter and because I love them.
It was a few days ago I received a knock on the door from a guy and girl, dressed really cute, and probably in their early twenties at least. They proceeded to hand me a pamphlet, pause for my response, and turn away to carry on to the next house.
I won't get into details about what the pamphlet was about but I'm sure you can guess. The first thought I had was how desperately I wanted to tell them they didn't have to work so hard. That whatever they were driving from house to house to achieve, whatever they were missing work, school, or a fun getaway with friends for didn't actually need all the striving.
I won't get into details about what the pamphlet was about but I'm sure you can guess. The first thought I had was how desperately I wanted to tell them they didn't have to work so hard. That whatever they were driving from house to house to achieve, whatever they were missing work, school, or a fun getaway with friends for didn't actually need all the striving.
For all of you going through this now, let me just stop here and urge you to rest in God's endless grace and the truth that He is greater than any mistakes or short comings that have haunted you.
"Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." -2 Corinthians 12:8-9
When I think about the time when I have to face my failures as a parent, I am left with a sense of peace and hope rather than fear. The hope that in all the areas that I've "failed my children" and left them "without", that will be an area where they are invited into the fullness and success of Christ. The broken pieces I know I will leave them with can be perfectly restored as they fall into the love of Jesus.